Dear Annie: I retired early from a stressful job about a year ago and now work part-time in an office with one other full-time secretary who started at the same time I did. She pushes most of the work onto me while she spends most of her day on her cellphone or shopping online. When my work is done, I sometimes use my phone for personal tasks, too, to pass the time since the office can be very slow.

Unlike me, my co-worker is constantly on her phone. She spends all day texting, making personal calls, dictating to-do lists, arguing with relatives (for months, it was about her father’s estate and will), chatting with other people who work in our building, scheduling appointments, and even obsessively checking her home security cameras. She never puts it down! Meanwhile, I only check mine out of boredom on slow days.

When I started, she made it clear I’d be responsible for answering all calls, emails, faxes and foot traffic, so I handle everything while she avoids work. She’s delusional about her own phone use and even claimed in front of our boss once that I’m on my phone all the time, “just like [her] kids.” I just held my tongue in disbelief because I rarely use my cellphone at work.

Here is the issue, and I have never done this before. Recently at work, I glanced at my phone and noticed a friend of mine who owns a business was broadcasting a live video on social media. Wanting to catch it, I put in one earphone that connected to my cell while still answering office calls.

The doorbell rang a minute or two later, so I removed the earphone to answer the door. In the 30 seconds it took me to return, my coworker had destroyed my headphones. The tiny metal speakers were detached and dangling from wires hanging out of the ends, and the ear cushions were gone! She acted like it was a mystery, claiming the parts must’ve “just fallen off,” but you can see the glue marks where the ear cushions were broken off. The headphones are now unusable.

What should I do? My co-worker is close to our boss, even spending time with her outside of work, so I feel stuck putting up with her behavior. But this time, she crossed the line by even touching my property, let alone destroying it! This woman is in her late 40s but acts like a middle-schooler! She and I will sometimes get along fine, bring each other tokens or gifts etc., but then she does things like this or is just hostile out of the blue. We barely talk because she’s always on personal calls, yet she micromanages everything I do. I dread going to work and feel like she’s a backstabbing control freak.

She even went through my trash once, claiming she was checking for recyclable post-it notes. Now I take personal notes home to throw away because it feels like such an invasion of privacy. I can barely tolerate even a half-day shift with her. So much for my peaceful retirement job! Unfortunately, I get paid very well, and the job is so much calmer with more flexible hours than the job I retired from. Should I even bother talking to the boss, given how close they are? I feel stuck. — Trapped in a Toxic Office

Dear Trapped: Your co-worker’s behavior is absolutely unacceptable. But since she and your boss are friends, you’re right — and smart — to want to tread lightly. Continue to keep track of these indiscretions and try addressing them with her directly. At the very least, it’s more than reasonable to ask her not to touch your personal belongings.

If nothing changes, consider taking things to your HR rep first or your boss if you don’t have one. It’ll go over better if you focus not on your co-worker’s character, but instead on wanting to better balance the office duties, emphasizing that your main concern is keeping things amicable in the workplace.

If all else fails, seriously consider how much more of your retirement you want to sacrifice for money and flexible hours. No paycheck is worth constant stress and aggravation.